Failure, Disappointment, and Other Expectations in 2016

It's the beginning of a new year! Well, it was 21 days ago. With this nice, even-numbered year, we would like to continue our trend of underwhelming material such as the highly criticized program, The Amazing Adventure of Captain Quick, and build upon that rocky foundation with new faces and old hacks.

We aim for more content from newcomers and people outside the Flat Pack. An offer open to all creatives alike! (Finns need not apply). Also, we would like to finish the projects that we started. Such as...

The Amazing Adventures of Captain Quick


With three episodes released and another three on the way, we're ready to conclude the first (probably only) season of the show and finally answer all those questions you've been asking: 'That's it?', 'Is it over yet?,' and many more!

We aim for actual air time, on an actual radio station. Guerneville's KGGV FM "The Bridge" has the potential to reach 4,500 people!


Sleepo blog shot.jpg

Our editor finally got his hands on SLEEPO, and now the film is in the production room. We have three hours of footage to look over, edit, color grade, audio mix, score, test screen, re-edit, re-shoot, give up, re-re-edit, THEN release.

Dow Jones 2

The rumors and photo of the script we posted are true. A script for the highly apprehensive sequel, Dow Jones: Outsourced to Kung-Fu Island, has been written and now is in the eager, young, supple, soft hands of the original Dow Jones co-director, Jackson Rosenfeld.

Now, the only thing needed is about 4 million dollars to make it or do rewrites. But don't expect anything. Most sequels suck hard. Except for Terminator 2.

the future!


Now for the vague stuff. Our goals are minimal but we like to keep the bar low in order to hate ourselves less when I write another one of these in 2017.

  • Produce 3 short films (minimum), all by different directors
  • Direct a horror short film
  • Pay back loans from Portuguese mob
  • Possibly begin creation on a feature film project
  • Meet Scott Baio*
  • Create more installments of Good Morning Bad Morning
  • Get Super Famous
  • And filthy rich
  • Expose the Finnish menace
*Scott Baio

*Scott Baio

I don't think this sounds too unreasonable but it does sounds improbable. I hope that the dedicated fan of Flat Quack Films will stick with us for the coming year and show support like they did that one time. It was really nice. Watch out 2016. It's the year of the Duck!